i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize