"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
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