you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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