Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
