hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize