We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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