What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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