How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.