I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
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