she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
splinters make it hard to masturbate
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.