i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
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i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.