i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
These tits shall not be calmed
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
