He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.