Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up http://tfl.nu/pfce
  Replies (3) Good night (1102) Bad night (569)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk. http://tfl.nu/t1w6
  Replies (2) Good night (1108) Bad night (442)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind. http://tfl.nu/lf45
  Replies (15) Good night (4542) Bad night (1162)
• Favorite

  (870): View more from Arkansas

  Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (870): Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear. http://tfl.nu/uzj4
  Replies (8) Good night (2925) Bad night (978)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad... http://tfl.nu/0y4t
  Replies (5) Good night (824) Bad night (2126)
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (403): Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season. http://tfl.nu/yv9x
  Replies (9) Good night (2513) Bad night (885)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here. http://tfl.nu/6x4c
  Replies (3) Good night (2627) Bad night (608)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use. http://tfl.nu/hohz
  Replies (2) Good night (1245) Bad night (765)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (715): How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it. http://tfl.nu/19iz
  Replies (13) Good night (738) Bad night (1798)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff". http://tfl.nu/952s
  Replies (7) Good night (1135) Bad night (649)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head. http://tfl.nu/qs4d
  Replies (26) Good night (769) Bad night (1449)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear. http://tfl.nu/iuyq
  Replies (3) Good night (391) Bad night (767)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (510): There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do. http://tfl.nu/onee
  Replies (2) Good night (491) Bad night (297)
• Favorite

  (915): View more from Texas

  Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (915): Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas. http://tfl.nu/6zv2
  Replies (6) Good night (562) Bad night (335)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  "Only you can prevent yeast infections."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list (856): "Only you can prevent yeast infections." http://tfl.nu/zmgo
  Replies (4) Good night (524) Bad night (194)

Randomize