People in love make me want to vomit
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
You're a waste of cheezeits
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
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