I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason