so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
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Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
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He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
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