just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
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