I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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