my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize