Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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