I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.