no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.