My hair reeks of homosexuality.
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants