marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
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yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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