I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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