Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
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The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
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Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.