So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Randomize