I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Randomize