I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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