I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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