I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Randomize
