im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
PANTIES FOUND
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize