I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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