Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
is that a dick in a sweater?
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize
