Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Randomize
