He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Randomize