my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
we're making bets on your personal life
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.