Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Randomize
