He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.