i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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