careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
