next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
