they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
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What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
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