So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
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