I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
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