Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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