I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
why do cheetos always look like penises
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?