i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver