Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit