She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Your dad touched me again.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
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Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Every concussion has its silver lining
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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