she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
