put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.